VBAC or Not to VBAC

In about a month I'll be in a hospital ready to bring my second child into the world. How that happens is in question. I never knew just how controversial "giving birth" was, until I had my first child. I truly thought that it meant you go into the hospital, you go through labor, you come out with a baby. But that's not really the case, first you don't have to choose a hospital, you can give birth at home, or a birthing center or a hospital. You can have your husband/partner there, or your mother and mother-in-law or a doula or a birthing coach, just to name a few. And I didn't know that all of those choices are controversial. All of those choices are difficult and touchy subjects, with everyone having an opinion about it, from your mother to the checker at the grocery store. But one of the choices I'm making this time around is perhaps one of the most difficult and touchy of all. Whether I should have a vaginal birth or a second c-section. New recommendations by the College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists says that women who've had up to two c-sections can have a vaginal birth, and should be allowed to try. This flies in the face of conventional wisdom: once a C-Section always a C-Section. There is actually one word I left out of the new recommendations: "most". Most women... 60 to 80% according the ACOG... should be allowed to try vaginal birth after C-Section, or VBAC. The question I'm struggling with is: Am I "most" women? I'm over 35 and have other health complications, but my doctor says those shouldn't factor in to giving birth "naturally". There is a part of me that wants to try. To actually "give birth," to feel a child come from me the way nature intended (with an epidural... of course... I'm not that into the natural part). Plus, a c-section means a longer and more a difficult recovery, especially since I have a toddler who still wants and needs to be picked up and held which I can't do for weeks after a c-section. And finally, there is a part of me that wants to stand with other women who say: our babies, our bodies we don't need to be cut because its easier on the doctor's schedule and the hospital's liability and the insurance company's concerns. Despite my high-mindedness, the reality of my situation has to take over, I may not be most women. There is a strong chance that I'm putting my baby and myself at risk if I push for VBAC. And I trust my doctor to advise me in what is best for me and my baby girl with no regard to his schedule. The thing that finally ended the discussion in my head about VBAC or Second C-Section is the simple fact that no matter how little Cassidy arrives, she will be arriving. That ultimate truth erases most of the worries.